Finding Alternatives

‘Change your thoughts and you change your world.’

Norman Vincent Peale

Don’t focus on what you CAN’T do, but find alternatives that you CAN do.  I was very distressed when I couldn’t do my walking any more – I was quite well renowned locally for pounding the pavements at a very rapid pace listening to music – I loved it, but gradually it became impossible.  It started with occasional pains in my calves which would stop me in my tracks and take my breath away but then it deteriorated until it was permanent pain in my lower back, thighs (front, sides AND back), knees, ankles, feet…  It was heart-breaking and reduced me to tears on a number of occasions when I would try to go walking but would end up hobbling home in agony.

I was distraught for a long time.  Then, of course, not only did I have to stop walking, but my social life changed and I wasn’t able to go out as much as I had done previously.  Cancelling social events was incredibly hard, I really don’t like missing out and it initially went against every instinct in my body to cancel.  It was the complete opposite attitude of the person I’d always been, but I had no choice.

I realised in the end that I had to come up with new ideas and instead of dwelling on what I wasn’t doing, I needed a new focus.  My first new venture was joining a local health club where I could go with my children and swim in the evening.  Sometimes we’d stay at the club for something to eat too, making it more of a social event. 

Other times we would have family film nights, or a tournament on our games console, or my boys would spend the night at my parents’ house so I could luxuriate in the peace and quiet and make the most of the opportunity to pamper myself.  When I’ve suffered severe flare-ups I have been capable of nothing more than collapsing on the sofa for the evening or going to bed very early – even those evenings became an enjoyable experience because my body just needed it!

So instead of thinking about the party I was missing, or the friends I wasn’t seeing, I would think of how I was really enjoying myself doing things that were within my capabilities instead of pushing myself and being miserable.

For everything in life there is ALWAYS an alternative, you just have to look for it.